What a beautiful life…!

“Just when the caterpillar thought the world was ending, he turned into a butterfly.”   Proverb

SONY DSCSometimes we walk through life thinking that everything we do is mediocre and dull. And we may think that we are not achieving anything, instead we are looking at everybody else and they seem to have one success after another. They are happily smiling and looking all relaxed and if they don’t have one care in the world. I often wonder why we keep comparing ourselves to others?

Life is not a competition, there’s nothing that says that we have to do things in a certain way, that we need to live our lives like this or that. I myself falls in to the category of people that use to think very low of myself, and having very low self-esteem. And that was because of many circumstances that I had to live through since I was very young. I was often asking myself why don’t I live in a happy family? Why don’t I have all the fancy clothes that every other girls in school seems to have? Why can’t we have that tight family connection? Well, the list is long, but these are few of the questions I often use to ask myself when I was a lot younger than I am today.

Does it sound familiar to you? Have you had the same type of thoughts? Well, do not give up, that is my humble advice. Life is what it is and we simply have to make the best of it as we possibly can. However, to me it took many years before I started to change the way I was looking at things and life itself. I never really revolted as a teenager, let’s put it this way my puberty was somewhat delayed. It was not until I was in my mid thirties that I simply turned around and started to ‘revolt’ and refusing to do things the way that other people were expecting me to. All those years of accepting and just coping had been effecting me of course. And as I always say that Rome was not built in one dayto change the way you see things and how you do things, it does take time.

When I was in my late thirties I left my home country to go to work in Ireland. And that was really saving me from going under as a person, that was a step I had to do. Because firstly I needed a job, and it seems like it was easier to get a job abroad than in my own country due to high competition. And since I didn’t have any academic education I was doomed to fail, in a way. My simple thought was, that I didn’t have anything to loose really. And I desperately needed a new start for myself, and one thing I haven’t been afraid of is to take the leap and start new things. I can only look back on the past nine years living here in Ireland, how I have been going as a person and gotten a lot stronger in myself.

I have always been interested in people and their behaviour. I suppose I spent a lot of time observing others when I was growing up, and I came across some really horrible behaviour very close in our family. But I am not going to go into any details about it, just that it has changed my view of life a bit. And I vouch for simplicity in my life, there’s no need to make things more complicated than they need to be. And today I received response from my first assessment in the forensic science course I am taking, the tutor was giving me a good score on it and this made me feeling proud of myself, it gave me such esteem and energy. It made me saying to myself, you are good at what you are doing. I am totally in for this and know this is going to be a good thing.

Think of the caterpillar that thought that life was ending, and he turned in to a butterfly. I think that is a good comparison, but perhaps sometimes hard to see yourself at. But, do not give up or loose yourself in the process, when you are going through something hard or when people are treating you unfairly. Just raise above them and do what you have to do and what is good for YOU! I cannot emphasise enough how important you are for yourself.

Wishing everybody a great weekend!

Eva’s Chronicles (praying for France and it’s people after the terrible attacks they experienced on Friday)

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8 Comments

  1. Good post Eva. I agree with everything you said. Everyone needs to be themselves and stop worrying about what other judgemental people think. I am all for becoming that caterpillar – at my age the caterpillar will have some wrinkles though. lol

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Dearest Eva,
    You are so very honest and for your age a very wise and mature woman! Yes, we only can fully develop if we have the courage for separating from the often strangling mold we’re forced to live in. Once we manage that, we can grow and explore and blossom up in many ways.
    Feeling free, proud and a lot more secure and we ought to keep a certain safe distance from those that have hurt us in the past. Avoiding toxic people is a MUST and very good for the brain as it causes stress.
    Nobody is perfect but that’s not what life is about, for letting others be and not wanting to be somebody else. The years traveling as international consultant has taught me valuable lessons.
    Fashion is only a laughable thing, I can say this now even after having studied fashion myself (forced to do so as I was not allowed to study and become a teacher… MY dream). Sure, I did make clothes for Mom, my sisters and myself and saved the family money but as far as ‘fashion’ goes, it is a big illusion. Having traveled in one month maybe to 2 or 3 continents you figure out that at any given time, everything is being sold somewhere. All with the same misleading label that it is ‘fashion now’. For half of the world it is autumn and the other half is in springtime. That is already a big contrast. Than it depends on one or a few persons what they will buy for their customers for any season…
    Far happier one becomes when we distance us completely from that forced behavior mold and do what we like and wear what we like and in which we feel ourselves best.
    You for sure will do very well in your new study as you’ve taught yourself to analyze already for years. You got a very keen eye and can see through a lot of things and weed out the important inner core…
    Great writing skills and you are talented in may ways. Go for it and be happy because you can be very proud of your achievements!
    Hugs,
    Mariette

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much Mariette for your nice comment. I have had a tough start which has made me see things differently I guess. You do learn a lot by study people and their behaviour. I really enjoy my studies and suppose it’s the analysing, and finding out the truth but I love about it. I keep my options open in life and who knows where it will take me but so far I enjoying the ride.

      Liked by 1 person

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