“Our hearts grow tender with childhood memories and love of kindred, and we are better throughout the year for having, in spirit, become a child again at Christmas-time.” [Laura Ingalls Wilder]
I think that Christmas is a special time, a time for families to get together to enjoy each others company and share what’s been happening throughout the year. Christmas is a time to take a break from all the busy schedules we have, a time to reflect on life and on people that we have around us, and be grateful for.
When Christmas time is approaching I get that feeling of excitement, hence my illustrations. I simply love it when I sit down at the drawing board letting my ‘younger’ self work away on the paper.
Here above is a selection of the illustrations that I have been creating during the months leading up to this Christmas. And as you can see I work a lot with the theme togetherness, and the reason for that is that Christmas to me has another side as well.
It reminds me of everything and everyone that I am missing. My Father is not around anymore, and my Mother is [I don’t know where] not around either, well she has been gone from my life for a very long time, close to 45 years. She is not dead, but decided to leave my Father and her children in 1970. So I was brought up with my Dad and older brother. And to me Christmas was a happy time back then, it was all the preparations, my grandmother was an excellent baker, and the cookies she made not to mention her special bread and buns. None of them are around anymore, grandparents from both sides are gone since many years, what remains are the memories and this part of my past is luckily good and happy memories.
It’s all these memories that are coming back each year, and there is a sting in my heart not having people around anymore. My siblings are spread all over the world, and we don’t get to meet as often as we would like. I have a younger sister living in Texas and we haven’t seen each other in 26 years!!! That is a very long time. The circumstances back then, mostly due to our Mother, kind of torn us apart. And it’s not until at grown up age we managed to pick up our contact again, after all those years. Even though we were brought up in different families, she with our Mother and me with my Dad [we have different fathers] there is always a bond between us. We have both been through the traumatic experiences with our mother, even though in different ways, but still it has had a big effect on us all. Luckily she and I are now able to talk about it and share our experiences. That wound is not going to heal in one day, and as I usually say that “Rome was not built in ONE day”. Need to try to build up the same contact with my other siblings, might prove a different struggle. I will never give up!
At Christmas it comes as a reminder to the things that we are missing out on with our own ‘blood’ family. We are both having lovely ‘new’ families around us with loving people, people that cares a lot:
This is a collage of my precious family
Me and hubby
Me and my Daughter
Family pictures from Christmas 2014 – Love All of my family to bits!! They all make my life filled with meaning – so I dedicate this Christmas post to each and everyone of you; Hubby Peter, Mark, Ruth, Malin, Tom, little grandson Jack and of course little Dotty [she is a mood booster á la mega] – You guys Rock big time!!!
~ Eva’s Chronicles ~